It's easy to be proud or to be diffident. These two qualities
inextricably co-exist within a person. Those who appear to be boastful are, in
fact, self-distrustful but they pretend to be strong so as to disguise their
inability. Even as a potent spiritual leader, Moses also took himself too
seriously.
Before Moses was appointed by God,
he was the prince of Egypt, young with strong physical power and sincerity in
solving the dispute between a Hebrew and an Egyptian. He helped his Hebrew
brother by killing the dishonest Egyptian. Although this young Moses has
sincerity, passion and fitness, this was not the Moses God has chosen. Waited
until Moses became weary in devastation and was settled with a simple life
shepherding in Midia, God reignited Moses's faith and summoned him for a
difficult task. However, the first thing God did was not to train Moses's
physicality, but to adjust his focus, shaping how he looked at himself before
letting him do his job.
When Moses encountered the angel of God in the flame of fire, God declared who HE is upfront, "I am the God of your fathers, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob." (Exodus 3:6) After God told him HIS plan, Moses's response revealed that he put all the focus on himself. He replied "Who am I to go to Pharaoh and take the children of Israel out of Egypt?" (Exodus 3:11) Moses considered bringing Israeli out of Egypt as his own duty, in which it relies on his own power. No matter how Moses felt at that moment, flattered, scared or he just wanted to escaped from the calling, or he wanted to be assured by God and hear more compliments, his replied "Who am I..." reflected true human nature. "Who am I" to achieve this difficult task? Can "I" finish it? "I" don't want to fail. "I" am the reason for the success or the failure. "I" am the key to everything.
The funny thing is God has not answered Moses's question about who he was. God readjusted Moses's focus, as HE said "Truly, I will be with you." (Exodus 3:12) It seems as if God was telling Moses to look clearly, to listen carefully. It is not "Who I am" but it is "Who God is." Learning from the new angle, Moses has changed his focus but obviously, he didn't know much about God. That's why he asked how he should reply to the Israeli when they asked Who God is? "What is his name? What am I to say to them?" (Exodus 3:13) God, once again, proclaimed "I AM WHAT I AM ... I AM has sent me to you." (Exodus 3:14) It's not you Moses. Listen, it's all about ME, God, the Lord, Jehovah. This whole salvation plan was designed by God and Moses was just a participant, an invited partner, so it did not depend on Moses's power nor his confidence. It all depended on how well Moses know about God and how faithful he was to rely on God. With true understanding, Moses would be willing to let God do wonder through him and God had promised Moses "to be with him." Moses had already got what he needed, God's company, which is the most powerful source a man could ever have.
Why would we feel disappointed by ourselves? Why would we think more of ourselves or think less of ourselves? It is because we focus too much on "the self." Do remember one important lesson we can learn from Moses: we should not rely on our own strength or confidence to finish what God wanted us to do; instead, we should let go and let God work his incredible wonder on us. We are HIS tools. At the beginning of the year, I hope that we can all learn more about God every day. Adjust our focus. Think about ourselves less and experience "God is with us" each and every day. It is not "Who I am", but "Who God is" as always.
No comments:
Post a Comment